{BIG QUESTIONS} Why are they telling me that?

Welcome to Day 2 of our discussion on our second BIG QUESTION:

Does it really matter who I listen to? 

Check out yesterday’s post for the beginning of our dialog.

Learning to discern others’ motives is a key factor in becoming wise.   And this principle is not only applicable to actions … but also to words, including advice.

King Xerxes sought advice from several people and groups of people.  Looking over your notes from yesterday, did you see any pattern for the king?

This is what I noticed … He asked whoever was around at the time.

I’m going out on a limb here:

“That’s not the best plan.  It’s not even a good plan.  In fact, it’s a very poor plan.”

From yesterday’s reading, I find four specific motivations for the counsel given to King Xerxes.

1.  Self-preservation (Esther 1:13-22, 2:1-4)
The king’s counselors gave him advice that benefitted them!  They were not concerned about his best interest … they led him to make decisions that helped them.    Warren Wiersbe’s commentary on Esther says:

“Concerned about the repercussions of Vashti’s disobedience, the king asked his seven counselors what she should do.  The first thing they did was exaggerate the importance of the event … These counselors were playing it smart; for by exaggerating the problem, they also inflated their own importance and made the king more dependent on them.” (Be Committed, 79-80)

Wiersbe continues to explain their motivations in advising the king to find a new queen.

“The king’s advisors were concerned that Vashti not be restored to royal favor; for if she regained her throne, their own lives would be in danger.  After all, it was they who had told the king to remove her.”  (84)

King Xerxes lacked discernment … he was prideful and susceptible to panderings to his ego.

2.  Selfish Agendas (Esther 3:8-15)
We’ll do a deeper investigation into Haman’s agenda next week but for now we need to understand that often people seek to counsel our decisions based on their own prejudice and bias.  Haman sought revenge … using the king and his position of influence to achieve his personal goal.

Charles Swindoll shares the following in Esther: A Woman of Strength and Dignity:

“Haman is telling the king what he wants to hear, but he’s not telling the king the whole story.  Haman doesn't mention his own prejudice, his own long-standing prejudiced grudge … No, he deliberately hides his real motive while acting as if he has only the king’s good at heart.”  (66)

Again, we see the king’s lack of discernment.  He did not seek any corroboration or further counsel and is an example of the truth in Proverbs 18:13:

“He who answers before listening – that is his folly and his shame.” (NIV)

3.  Self-importance (Esther 6:6-10)
I love this portion of Esther!  Feels like the great “Gotcha!” when you know the rest of the story.  Haman is completely convinced of his own invincibility … his importance to the king.  And it renders him blind to the truth.   He advises the king to give honor to another assuming he is the only one the king would desire to recognize.  Vanity!!

I think of another Proverb:

“Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” (16:18, NIV)

Haman would have done well to heed the wisdom of Albert Einstein:

“Try not to become a man of success, but try to become a man of value.”

So, have you noticed a trend in these motivations for counsel … any four letters stand out to you?  *S.E.L.F.*  We must be aware that many who will seek to advise us are motivated by selfishness.  But there is a final motivation we find in these passages.

4.  Protection of others (Esther 8:1-8)
Perhaps one of the most familiar verses in Esther is the queen’s declaration,

“If I perish, I persish.” (4:16, NIV)

When the queen and Mordecai advised the king, their motivation was entirely the protection of others.   If you have read the rest of Esther, you know the Jews did not plunder those they defeated, though they had every right to do so.   The advice given to the king was not given to diminish or destroy him, rather it was to protect the innocent.

The best advice we receive is motivated by Paul’s admonition:

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.  Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:3-4, NIV)

We must pray for wisdom in discerning motives of those who would seek to advise us.  And be mindful of counsel that does not measure up to God’s Word.
 

Have you ever been advised by someone with impure motives?  Did you listen?  Why or why not?  What was the result?

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